bookworm cafe

best blog for reviews book sonnets,and stanzas

Archive for the 'stanza' Category


ME Myself and HER

Posted by adrainsean on January 19, 2008

Look back at the day it all began.
Your taste still lingers here.
Your touch still invades my world.
You got your wish.
But what about mine?

How long is this going to last?
Some questions have no answers…
Some things are better left unsaid…
Some words are never spoken…
They are felt.
I am still dreaming.
I wish I could wake up.

You still have that effect on me.
It rains because I still cry.
Why do I run away?
I wish you could know why I do this.
I can still hear you breathe.
I can still smell your scent.
I wonder why I love you still?

I don’t know you anymore.
But I know my scars.
I can show you.
Are you ready?
Do you even remember me?
Do you even read this?
She does.

She knows I am wounded but loves me still.
Who’s love is greater?
Mine or her’s?
I hope love does not do the same to us.
She tries to fix me,
and makes a bigger mess.
She tries to love me anyway.

I know you’re happy without me,
and that you are sad as well.
Is it possible to love a dead heart?
Can you answer that?
I guess it is…
because she loves me…
…and I love you.

Posted in college survival tips, humor, monolouges, pieces from my mind, poems, stanza | 1 Comment »

DIVA AND MYSELF:WALK AND TALK BY THE BOOKWORMCAFE

Posted by adrainsean on November 29, 2007

I kinda hate talking with the Diva..when she’s all so quivery-lipped worried about entrance exams and suchlike, but then deep down inside I am anxious too..the anxiety leads on to frustration and depression [all deep inside, mind you]..and I take it out thus:

The Diva: all the maths is depressing me

The Diva: cant handle maths gives me NEGATIVE VIBES

The Diva: you know everyone in our class is preparing full-on.

Me: so?

Me: everyone in our class has weekly sex.

Me: are you doing anything to improve vocabulary?

Me: do that, and you’ll stop feeling bad about the maths.

The Diva: wait, about the weekly sex how do u know? the celebrities peeks tells us all

Me: tell me the names of the people who are preparing.

(The Diva blurts out some names)

Me: yeps, all of them

Me: if not the sex,

Me: then they are making out right?

Me: you don’t think they live without sex..do you?

Me: even if they don’t go all the way

Me: All of them do a lot of things

The Diva: wait! the convocation is lost, are we talking sex or studies?

Yes I know I will do anything to keep people from talking about the things I wouldn’t want to hear.
In case you’re wondering how I got so bold, [!?]
read this .

Then I was thinking about how I could die just because of this usually-effective-but-damn-painful custom of 200 abdomen crunches every morning.I mean I can walk the treadmill and keep stepping on the stepper and twist along the twister and do all sorts of things..that too early in the morning. But the ab-cruncher situation is the catch-22 in my life right now.
Its been five minutes since I looked up “catch-22″, so I kinda like had to use it in this post.

Also, as you can see, I am blogging quite regularly , and I am playing online word games with such dedication and ferocity that I’ve started day-dreaming about “what are the words ending with

Posted in monolouges, pieces from my mind, stanza | Tagged: , , | No Comments »

BORN IN BROTHELS:ANURAG KASHYAP

Posted by adrainsean on November 21, 2007

I am sure you haven’t been able to sleep at night for the past few days. I have received many an email, reeking of tears and other bodily fluids, imploring me to post something, anything. I received missed calls at ungodly hours waking me up from surreal dreams. Well, I exaggerated just a little bit there, just like any sincere blogger would, but you get the drift. Comcast (ISP and Cable provider) would like to extend their apologies to you. I came home one day from work to find the W sprawled on the floor looking at the modem like it was a Rubik’s cube that was winking at him with its six little lights (LED’s for geeks) in random order and the 42 displaying a depressing “There is no service” or something morose like that, which was more suited on a tombstone.

The W went into depression, thus exhibiting the 21st century man’s extreme reliance on the World Wide Web, much like an addict’s manic craving for a hit during withdrawal. The Internet has trapped the average non-suspecting citizen of society (bespectacled and otherwise) into its Web (Ever wonder why its called Web?). While I was feeling bad about not being able to blog and thus spread yuletide and joy among my readers, as I have come to do in the past month or so, the sadistic mind wanted to see the W writhe in mental agony as he fidgeted from the couch to balcony, and then back to the couch with periodic mutterings of ‘Life is so depressing’.

This reminded me of those days back in Calcutta, almost two decades back when we were hit by regular bouts of what was commonly known as “load shedding”, when I got breaks from mugging up Bangla chhora (children’s poems) about bullock carts in lands that existed only in my reluctant imagination to carefully make my way up to our terrace with the help of a candle to cuddle up next to Amma (my paternal grandmother) and watch the often star studded sky. She loves the sky and actually wanted to christen me Akash (and still refers to me that way in moments of extreme affection) but my parents thought the name was too common and shot the idea down, but that’s a whole different family controversy.

An improvement in the economic situation meant that inverters gave us the feeling of pseudo “load sheddings” since only certain lights were allowed to be on but no fans, before we officially broke into the upper middle class with a generator which took away the whole experience altogether. Along with the summer sweat of “load sheddings”, also disappeared the romantic charm of the darkness and the clear sky. Net failures are the “load sheddings” of our generation, albeit with a less cooler name. Who knows, maybe I will recite the story of the W and the lost Net to my grandchildren some day when the Internet will be replaced by something stronger, faster and more secure, unless we manage to destroy the world before that.

Came across Anurag Kashyap’s blog today (thanx Google!). I have become a fan of the man after watching No Smoking recently. Reading some of the blog postings did nothing to lessen the sentiment. The postings are as honest as his films and his writing, often written after a few pegs have been downed, thus often without apparent regard for grammar. He can come across as bitter and arrogant, but I think he is just angry and frustrated more than anything else, and the reasons he spells out affected me a bit the same way, surprising me.

He talks about the sorry state of independent films in India and being a cinema enthusiast, I could only reflect how empty life would be without delightful little indigenous films like Bheja Fry, Johnny Gaddar and of course No Smoking being made; about how this discourages paranoid people like me who go to bed with film making dreams in their eyes every night to abandon their current semi-luxuriant lives to give shape to their abstract ambitions; about going through life without ever coining the words job and satisfaction in the same breath. I was so absent-minded, I even honked at a pickup that did not turn when the light to go straight turned green.

To make matters worse, right now Born Into Brothels is showing me the half-baked dreams of the unwanted children of the sex workers of Calcutta on the 42. Its showing me hope in their eyes that has a very slim chance of being converted into reality, even with the film maker’s magnanimous attempts on a relatively small sample space of such individuals. What are striking are the matter-of-fact of some of the children when talking about their dead or socially reclusive parents and some of their artistic talents. The W laughs at my theory that some of the kids are so talented because their fathers are gifted individuals of the high strata of society we reside in. Damn! why did Com cast have to correct their mistake?

Posted in authors, born in brothels, literature, pieces from my mind, reviews, short stories, stanza | Tagged: , , , , | No Comments »